Anatomy of a Flounder

Small down day yesterday, but here is a dissection that you are all too familiar with:

• 5th in a $33 SNG, pushing with TPBK on an underpaired board (TPTK called me)
• Played a little NLHE trying to win it back, but got stuck another $38.25 with AT flopping top two pair vs. AA
• Jump to a $5/10 table and get stuck another -$289. Big hands were: JJ vs. 55 (I win with flopped set), 77 vs KK (paired flop/underpair; A on river saved another bet), bb 65s on board of 62777 (88 and JJ), KQs (caught K on turn), QJ vs. AK (flopped Q), KK vs AA, QJs vs same AA guy (J on flop; OK, actually river he checked turn then check/raised my river bet), AA vs. QQ (he flopped Q), Q9 vs. AJ (I had nothing left, board was KKJ)
• Jump to $10/20, no open tables with list of 15, so I sit at a two-person table that are both gone, two people sit down, I play ten hands, win $289: TT vs. 99, 77 on board of 9957 (folded), QT vs. A9 (flopped T), A4 and caught A on flop, AKo on rag board (guy bailed on turn). Is it wrong to hit and run after ten hands? I think so, I really do. Did I do it? Yes.
  
• Night session: $10/20 full-ring, -$700, brutal hands included TT raise with four others in, flop of T84 with two clubs (four stay with me), 5d on turn (one stays), Qs on river (I cap it to the Jd9d); win a pot raising with A9 suited flopping top pair then turning A; I raise early in session with A8s, flop top pair, QJ stays in for turned Q; I win a pot with KJs and catch K on river with TAA on board (vs. QQ); call raise with JTs and flop KQx, turn T then eventually bail; you can fill in the blanks but lost 29 consecutive pots that had my money in it (including blinds) to give me stats of 20.3/10.1. Won three pots for the session of 119 hands.
  
• Wrote some of this, then returned to $10/20 around 11:45 or so. Another 119 hands, this time +$341 with one horrible laydown (QQ to a three-bet, I bet to the river when an A hit and I folded; I have to call the river with the pot odds, he gave me a lol and kq, which was either true or not). 21.84/14.29, which was close to normal. Had KQs flop a K vs. AA. Too tired to give any more details; suffice it to say that sometimes I won and sometimes not.
  

So down $430for the day, and I feel like I'm in a funk at the table. Don't feel very confident, feeling a constant fight to be patient vs. jumping into hands. The afternoon 5/10 table was 20.38/12.2 for me over 157 hands, so fairly typical stats. If anything, it was on the tighter side as most of the players were TAG's (one loose guy, but the winners were all squeezers). This is poker and variance. The loss and getting stuck I'm not too concerned about as I think I made the right decisions. I think the major danger sign is the lack of patience on my part evidenced by the jumping up to 10/20 short-handed to try and start a table, a dumb move on my part that had fortunate, even lucky results. I'm a horrible short-handed player, and I jumped up in stakes, so again these are symptoms in my mind. The tough night session, I don't know. I had good hands either chased down or missed flops. I didn't catch any pots when not hitting anything. I tried a few things that didn't connect.

Maybe I'm alone in the seductive attraction that comes with online play, but these are things I would never do live. When I say never I mean never, ever. If I got stuck live, I would either take a walk or try and cool off at a low-limit table. I think it has something to do with the laptop, spreadsheet, and the cashier function. I know exactly where I stand at all times with my bankroll online. Live is just different. Mentally, I question if I'm in the best of shape, if I'm prepared to play my best. It isn't full fear, it's just hesitance and longing for the lost bankroll. I haven't gotten reckless, which is a positive. I've played within my bankroll, so these struggles haven't cratered me. These are all good things.

Not that I need to pimp Amy Calistri, but her new entry into bloggerdom after her stay at PokerPages is jumping through the roof with traffic if the folks coming here from her site is any indication. Most of us are either degenerates or dorks (or both), but it is very gracious for folks like Amy, Linda, Pauly, Felicia, Joe Sebok, BadBlood, WillWonka, Dave, Luke, and many others to email, pimp, or comment to others. Do people have time to do these things? Well, look we all make the time and waste gobs of time reading and posting. I'm a fairly confident, borderline arrogant person at times, but I can honestly tell you that I get pumped up to hear from Jordan or TripJax or to get an unsolicited email from Pauly or Dave or Miami Don, none of whom have I met. We're all in our own worlds, we are each the most important person in our own lives. But when we can take the time to encourage, give advice, or just say hello to another blogger; well, you just never know what it might mean to that person. I think ultimately these poker blogs are an opportunity to meet people many of us would never meet in our lives, to put our thoughts about a hobby or passion we are pursuing down for ourselves as well as for others. All the other stuff, the great strategic minds, the laughter and funny stuff, the hand histories--all of that is gravy. Not superfluous, if that's the right word, but just a bonus.

So thanks for stopping by. Still need a few addresses, so please email me if you have a book. Hope you