06 January 2008

Living Now to its Fullest

I'm sure I'm not alone in this, but sometimes I've felt everyone is a robot except me, that I'm the only living, breathing soul on the planet and the world totally revolves around me. I outgrew this for the most part, but occasionally there will be moments when everything seems to collide exactly where I sit. I've had Dr. Chako and The Wife on my mind a multitude of times, I'm not exactly sure why. Today, they were there as well along with all of the things I've grappled with over the last six months.

The sermon from today's church service was from the 90th Psalm.

A prayer of Moses the man of God.
1 Lord, you have been our dwelling place
throughout all generations.

2 Before the mountains were born
or you brought forth the earth and the world,
from everlasting to everlasting you are God.

3 You turn men back to dust,
saying, "Return to dust, O sons of men."

4 For a thousand years in your sight
are like a day that has just gone by,
or like a watch in the night.

5 You sweep men away in the sleep of death;
they are like the new grass of the morning-

6 though in the morning it springs up new,
by evening it is dry and withered.

7 We are consumed by your anger
and terrified by your indignation.

8 You have set our iniquities before you,
our secret sins in the light of your presence.

9 All our days pass away under your wrath;
we finish our years with a moan.

10 The length of our days is seventy years—
or eighty, if we have the strength;
yet their span [a] is but trouble and sorrow,
for they quickly pass, and we fly away.

11 Who knows the power of your anger?
For your wrath is as great as the fear that is due you.

12 Teach us to number our days aright,
that we may gain a heart of wisdom.

13 Relent, O LORD! How long will it be?
Have compassion on your servants.

14 Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love,
that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days.

15 Make us glad for as many days as you have afflicted us,
for as many years as we have seen trouble.

16 May your deeds be shown to your servants,
your splendor to their children.

17 May the favor [b] of the Lord our God rest upon us;
establish the work of our hands for us—
yes, establish the work of our hands.


I hadn't read this passage before, but it was incredible into the insight into my own experiences. This is about how fleeting life yet how we waste so many of our days. This is about how to live before we need to know what it means to confront the end of our life. Verse 12 hits me so strongly, "Teach us to number our days..."

I mention that Dr. Chako and The Wife have been on my mind because they are living this much more tangibly than I am to say the least. Dr. Chako watches over young men and women, healing some while burying others. I dare say very, very few of those he watches depart have lived a full life; their best days were ahead of them yet now could be named. Was it the day the young soldier convinced his future wife to take his hand? Was it the day he persevered and made it as a Marine? Was it the heroic day or was it the day of tenderness when she cared for her dying mother five hundred days before landing in this place?

With half of the Earth separating these two lovers, would either the good doctor or his lovely wife not give up their favorite trinket for one dinner together, one breathtaking sunset over the ocean, one nap in bed with their child beneath the sheets?

But God not only speaks of living each day, He tells us to live each day for purpose. Verse 17 says, "May the favor [b] of the Lord our God rest upon us; establish the work of our hands for us—yes, establish the work of our hands." The pastor said establish or confirm means to make permanent, to create a legacy.

Can today and Monday be such a life, hours of desperation to live, to love, to serve, to teach, to care as I am capable? I think it is possible. Maybe that day isn't Monday, but maybe Monday can bring me five steps closer to that day. I hope so.

Hope everyone is having a great weekend. I hope your day today and Monday tomorrow brings you closer to that day.


Blogger The Wife said...

You leave me in tears; always thoughtful, always selfless. So on those days where I feel overwhelmed and underappreciated and overcommitted and underprepared, I will try to remember your words. And when he returns safely, god willing, I will try to remember to number my days with him and show him the things I appreciate most about him, some of which I only really came to understand by not having him here.

You are a good man, CC. Thank you for caring.

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